by Karen A.
My mom and dad didn’t go to church, but Dad took my sisters and me to a little Baptist church, along with my Grandma, every Sunday. I remember praying when I was 11,”Lord, I want to be a Christian”. Shortly after that, a lay preacher came and spoke to our congregation. I became a believer that night and had the assurance deep inside that I really was a Christian
The year before, after completing a class that the pastor taught, I was asked if I wanted to be baptized. Even though I didn’t really understand it all, I went ahead and got water baptized. My Sunday School teacher kept talking about the wonderful relationship she had with the Lord and the joy of knowing her sins were forgiven. I didn’t quite understand it until that night when the lay preacher came and the Lord became real to me.
I began reading the Bible, starting at the beginning. I got bogged down in Leviticus and Numbers, and sadly, quit reading. I still went to church for several years, but lost my way until my sophomore year of high school.
Things were difficult at home. My dad was drinking more than ever and we didn’t get along. Most of the times we communicated, it was an argument. There was verbal and physical abuse. I was miserable, and so discouraged that I didn’t want to live anymore.
At some point in high school, maybe even my freshman year, I began attending Youth for Christ meetings. I was invited to go to a camp the summer before my junior year when I was 16. It was there that I rededicated my life to the Lord and have been following Him since then.
My life changed dramatically. I realized that there were things I needed to change in the relationship with my parents, I needed to respect them and quit mouthing off. I began reading the Bible again and I memorized parts of it.. God filled the emptiness inside of me and gave me hope and peace. I felt like I had a purpose in life. I found good friends that encouraged me in this new way of life.
A couple of years later, I was baptized again, this time realizing what it was all about; that I was publicly proclaiming that I belonged to Him. I don’t remember if this was a dream, but I remember seeing a picture of myself in a dark castle. The drawbridge was opening and I began walking out, free! I saw green grass and the light of sunshine and a path ahead of me through a hilly meadow. It gave me such hope that the old things were gone and the new had come!
I was blessed to be married and have 7 wonderful kids! Of course, life is not all sunshine and meadows, but I am free from the darkness and I learned that I was never alone; that Jesus would never leave or forsake me. He has been faithful! I have had trust issues, and many times, when I needed Him most I ran away from Him in some form, stopped praying and reading the Bible, and blamed Him for my pain. He has been so patient with me. Gradually, I learned how much He loved me and I began trusting Him more. I have blown it so many times too, but He keeps forgiving me. Those around me have been forgiving as well. He has helped me in the challenges of parenting and marriage.
During one particularly difficult season in my life, when there was a lot of pain and I felt so alone, He spoke to me from the Psalms and He comforted me. Since that time, I have felt like I know and trust God in a deeper way and I know that I know, that I know, that He is real and trustworthy. I know that He loves me. I love Him very much and I’m so grateful for all that He has done. He saved my life, and I owe Him everything.
He has provided for me, blessed me in so many ways, and brought me through hard things. I’m grateful for Him just being with me and being a friend like no other; the one who paid the ultimate price..His death for my sins so that I could be free and live in relationship with Him now and forever.